We all know that exercise is important. We hear about its benefits constantly, from heart health and bone strength to mood, sleep, stress regulation and cognitive health and more. Research continues to show that movement has an extraordinary “bang for your buck” effect across multiple areas of wellbeing.

In many ways, this is not surprising. Human beings are built for movement, and our physical and emotional systems are deeply interconnected. When we move regularly, many parts of the body and mind tend to function better together.

For many of us, the challenge is not understanding that exercise matters. The challenge is finding sustainable ways to keep moving through the changing realities of everyday life.

Across the lifespan, our capacity changes as work, parenting, stress, illness, ageing and other demands shift. The aim is to find enough movement to support health and wellbeing within the season of life we are in.

Awareness and finding your Baseline

Awareness is the foundation of sustainable change. Rather than judging yourself against external standards or comparing your experience to other people’s journeys, it helps to begin by recognising yourself as a unique individual with your own history, circumstances, and lived experience. From this place, shifting into curiosity allows you to ask yourself a different set of questions to help establish your baseline. Once you understand your baseline, setting goals and noticing change, becomes clearer, more realistic, and often more rewarding.

A helpful place to start is, simply noticing where you are right now, without judgement. You might begin with a few gentle questions:

1. How stressed or stretched do I feel at the moment? 
2. Am I currently doing any movement or exercise at all? (Even walking counts.) 
3. When was the last time I moved my body in a way that felt intentional? 
4. If I have stopped or reduced movement, do I have a sense of why this changed? 

Sometimes the answer is clear and you will say things like; “I have no time to myself.” or “I work full time and then on the weekend it is all about the kids.” or there may be a particular injury or illness that you are carrying. Sometimes it is less obvious, and you might notice that the answer is not clear one way or the other. You might sense some ambivalence. “I know I should exercise more but I am exhausted.” or “ I know it might make me feel better, but it is too much at the moment.” 

If you have any known physical limitations, pain or medical concerns, it is always good to seek advice from a GP, physiotherapist or relevant health professional before increasing activity.

Building an Upward Spiral

Once you have identified your baseline, you can begin to build momentum. It does not matter if your starting point is no exercise at all. 

It is easy to approach exercise from an “all or nothing” mindset. This often happens when we set a fixed goal, such as going to the gym four times a week, and assume that success depends on meeting that exact standard. However, life rarely cooperates with that level of rigidity. As parents, you will know that children get sick, you get sick, work becomes demanding, sleep is disrupted, and energy can simply run out. When this happens, it can feel like you have to start all over again.

A more sustainable way of understanding change is the idea of an upward spiral.

Unlike a straight line, an upward spiral recognises that we often revisit familiar challenges like fatigue, lack of time, or loss of motivation. However, each time we come back to them, we do so with more awareness of our patterns, our capacity, and what is realistic for us when we consider the whole package of our life at this time.

At its simplest, an upward spiral begins with small, manageable actions. When your energy is low, this might be a short walk, a few minutes of stretching, or simply choosing movement that fits around daily life rather than competing with it.

Over time, these small actions begin to build a sense of familiarity and possibility again. Movement feels less like something you have to “get back to,” and more like something you are gently staying connected with.

The beauty of the spiral is that, unlike a circle, it does not keep bringing you back to exactly the same place. Even when life interrupts your routine, there is still a gentle sense of movement and learning over time. The spiral allows for flexibility, and it does not demand perfection or constant progression. Instead, it recognises that there will be periods where you need to slow down, adapt, or temporarily lower your expectations, while still remaining connected to yourself and your wellbeing. In this way, the spiral can feel far more forgiving than either running in circles or endlessly trying to climb a ladder.

What enough looks like in practice

Once you have a sense of your current baseline, the next question becomes: what is realistic and supportive from here?

A few gentle starting points might include:

• Something is better than nothing. Even 5–10 minutes of movement can support mood, energy and stress regulation. 
• Start where you are, not where you think you “should” be. A short walk, stretching, or basic strength movements at home all count. 
• Use how your body feels as a guide. A helpful level of movement often feels like a gentle increase in warmth, breathing a little deeper, or feeling more awake afterwards rather than exhausted. 
• Build consistency before intensity. Regular, manageable movement is more supportive than occasional high-effort sessions that are hard to maintain. 
• Make it easier to start. Home-based options (like YouTube or short guided sessions) can reduce barriers when time, childcare or energy are limited. 
• Choose what fits your current season of life. Some stages may support going out to exercise; others may work better with movement at home. Both are valid. 
• Notice what helps rather than what you “should” do. The most effective exercise is often the one you can realistically repeat.

Final thought

Enough should look different at different stages of life. There will be times where movement will feel strong and consistent, and other times where it is simply about staying gently connected to your body. When we use our awareness to meet ourselves where we are, rather than where we think we should be, exercise becomes something sustainable, supportive and enjoyable. 

References

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2. McEwen BS. Stress, adaptation, and disease: allostasis and allostatic load. Ann N Y Acad Sci. 1998;840:33-44. doi:10.1111/j.1749-6632.1998.tb09546.x Link

3. Mailey EL, Huberty J, Dinkel D, McAuley E. Physical activity barriers and facilitators among working mothers and fathers. BMC Public Health. 2014;14:657. doi:10.1186/1471-2458-14-657 Link

4. Yin M, Li Y, Aziz AR, Buffey A, Bishop DJ, Bao D, et al. Short bouts of accumulated exercise: review and consensus statement on definition, efficacy, feasibility, practical applications, and future directions. J Sport Health Sci. 2025;15:101088. doi:10.1016/j.jshs.2025.101088 Link

5. Murphy MH, Lahart I, Carlin A, Murtagh E. The effects of continuous compared to accumulated exercise on health: a meta-analytic review. Sports Med. 2019;49(10):1585-607. doi:10.1007/s40279-019-01145-2Link

6. Churchill R, Teo K, Kervin L, Riadi I, Cosco TD. Exercise interventions for stress reduction in older adult populations: a systematic review of randomised controlled trials. Health Psychol Behav Med. 2022;10(1):869-89. doi:10.1080/21642850.2022.2125874 Link

Katrina Gow is a counsellor and psychotherapist in private practice in Melbourne, working with parents, caregivers, and adults navigating complex life situations. Her practice, The Slow Work, draws on nervous system science, embodied awareness, and thirty years of Iyengar yoga practice to support people through stress, burnout, and the particular demands of raising children in demanding times. She serves as an advisor on the Deakin University School Attendance Project and writes regularly for the Victorian Parents Council on parent wellbeing, capacity, and family stress. www.theslowwork.com.au